The Unfinished Canvas- Being True to Who We Are

“Ambiguous Rose”- Unfinished Oil on Canvas (work in progress)

Inspiration, fear, the unknown. All describe the moments before putting paint to the blank canvas. What the blank canvas represents can all be a state of mind. We are either fearful of the unknown or feel inspired by what could be. What I have learned recently is that new ideas suddenly emerge when they are in right relationship with one another. Often when we think something is out of place it can really be in perfect harmony if left alone in its natural place.

Without the right context it doesn’t make sense. I learned this first hand this week while working on a new oil painting of a brilliant pink rose. There is always that moment while I am painting where I get lost, not seeing the whole. With my nose literally right up in the canvas I  am at a loss at which way to go. Do I add more pigment here? Was I too bold there? Are my values in harmony with one another?  Often when I get to this stage it is the white space or the unknown surrounding the image that I work on next. Because, I tell myself that without right context like in the case of the “ambiguous rose” it does not look like much of anything but a smattering of pink on white canvas.

So, I start adding context.  I think of what I may have done in the past that pulled a painting together. Waiting to be led and wondering if there will be struggle. Will there be obstacles along the way or will the path be clear? Most likely the struggle will surface but there will also be moments of pure clarity and knowingness how to proceed. Without giving much energy or emphasis on the “I think I may screw this up,” category but instead maybe just letting things be.

Sometimes by letting things be we think we are in the procrastination mode. However, there may be something deep within us that knows that even in the messiness or out of place something may look it has a place somewhere or somehow it’s just we can’t quite put our finger on it yet.

The unfinished canvas is in all of us. We are all beautiful and messy all at once. That is to change who we are or to subvert to someone else’s idea of who we should be is forgetting our own relationship to the world. The bigger picture. We all want to matter and feel that we fit somehow in all the aspects of our life. Yet, like the unfinished canvas we are all works in progress. Looking for ways to receive all those life giving elements needed to feel that sense of completion or wholeness within ourselves.

To change who we are for convenient sake or for someone else is like cutting the roots from a tree. All life-giving elements disappear in an instant. Often we subvert because we think we are being too bold. We tell ourselves to stop being who we truly are because it might just be too much. We conform because we think it is the only way to get through this world. Yet, few transformative experiences in life are tidy, neat and make any type of sense in the moment. They take time and often need that messy process of getting to know ourselves and our relationship to those around us.

When I look at a painting, it is in the relationship of color next to color that helps the image make sense. The interplay of each unique brush stroke having a life of one’s own but also contributing to overall pattern of the painting.True original expression cannot be planned in advance. And neither can we. As creators in our life and in our work the best we can do is to remain true to ourselves and open to what is moving in and around us. Without cutting ourselves off from what feeds us, fuels us, and allows us to be bold. Bold as defined by who we are without conforming to who we are not.

So, I will continue to work on my “ambiguous rose,” letting her take shape, not cutting her at her roots. But, allowing her to grow in context to her surroundings. Right where she is at in the moment, changing, evolving and occasionally getting the sense that she is right where she belongs.

The Handcrafted Life- crafting the soul-filled life

“Weaver’s Daughter” Watercolor on Arches, Alisha K. Duckett

I recently, was introduced to the concept of the “handcrafted life,” and was intrigued with the idea of it. It goes something like this, a handcrafted life is based on how you envision your life unfolding. It takes a lifetime to accomplish because itis where you focus your creative energies every day.  It is a practice of  bringing the inner life into the outer life in your own unique way.

For me, art has been the bridge from the inner to the outer. The practice of painting, writing or crafting is where a piece of the inner is shone brilliantly for all to see. But, most importantly from my vantage point as the artist. Because as the artist, you work with what you’ve got. As is in the handcrafted life, you gather that which is available and ready to you. You pick up what works, and turn it into something that has relevance and meaning. Similar to stringing a necklace, gathering those odds and end pieces only to string together some type of beauty. It may not be the type that the outside world sees as beauty, but  it is beauty non-the less. Because it is yours to behold, working patiently, stringing piece by piece, the parts of yourself that you want to put out into the world. What is your gifts, or way of expressing yourself that will have relevance to the outside world? How do you want to make your mark in such a way that is not necessarily earth-shattering but rather quiet, thoughtful and on purpose with who you are?

I suggest taking up a craft. Because, every time you create you infuse a little bit of you and what is going on in your life into your work.  And if you have the discipline to tinker away at your work whatever it may be. What is important or beautiful to you is suddenly there not by accident but on purpose.  Because it was there all along, just waiting for you to take the time to become aware. It is just now that you were able to see it for what it is. You will then have that well-stained shirt that says you have attempted to make something from nothing and that IT matters!

The creative life is not pre-programmed and neither should our life feel that way. when a life is hand crafted you are able take that spontaneity from your heart  and art only to put it right back into your creative efforts  in life. A cycle of turning within , creating, holding it up, taking it in, only to start the process all over again.

When I painted “weaver’s daughter,” pictured above. I was inspired by the cliff dwellings of  the native tribes of the southwest and my time there. I learned that the people that lived there were weavers. The thought of weaving, one’s life from the inside out suddenly had great meaning.  So, I painted the “weaver’s daughter,” the one that takes thread from that land, dyes it from pigments from the earth and weaves a beautiful image or story. A story that had meaning for the craftswoman, and one that she wanted to pass down to her children and her children’s children. I love the idea that there is legacy or ancient wisdom that the weaver’s wanted to pass along to help their loved ones on their journey in life. Maybe, a story that steers them to look for the answers to life’s pressing questions from some deep resounding space within.  Only to weave the answers into a complete pattern that is a vision for the weaver and her crafting of the soul filled life.  

Intuition Being Led By Art

“Intuition leads her heart, leads her soul, fills her with life.”  Alisha K. Duckett

Intuition, defined as “a quick and ready insight;” independent from knowledge or from reason. It can flower within us and make our lives more whole. Gently pushing us in the direction that is more aligned with who we are.

Listening to, trusting and acting on your intuitive inner guidance is an art form in itself. Think back to the times when it was not the right timing for something. You just knew. There is a harmony and flow within intuition that is rhythmic like a wave. You can choose to stand up and ride the wave at the right moment. Catch  it’s sudden insight. Or, choose to hesitate. Any hesitation, and you gain no momentum and miss the wave completely.

Following it’s insight can be risky because it does not follow a linear clear path. The path is often not logical or rational but has a destination none the less. In-tuition leads from the inside out drawing us out of our comfort zones. It  is however, pushing us toward something that reminds us of our true selves.  An aspect of ourselves that may not have been nourished now suddenly is given the right elements to grow and flourish. Intuition can lead us to what makes us happy or made us happy once but was forgotten.

To look within and to listen is to invite new life or new way of doing something in. Art can do this for us. It can draw us within allowing emotion and intuition to slowly take over and spill out on paper. It may just be some markings on a paper, that soon lead to an image that can have meaning and significance in our life. Or a song that you play over and over until it just makes sense.

You do not have to consider yourself an artist to do this. Just starting the process, mixing the colors, stepping back, being silent, taking it in. Letting it be, and waiting to feel the silent nudging to tell you what to do next.  

 

Live Your Best Dance! Bringing Back the Creative Fire..

“Struggling souls catch light from other souls who are fully willing to show it.”- Clarissa Pinkola Estes

The inner spark, that light within, the place where all creative life springs forth. It is the center of who we are. It makes us feel alive. It’s that “pizzazz”  behind our step. Emphasize the “z” in the word and all things are possible. It is the emotion and passion behind what we do and how we do it!

I witnessed this little spark first hand when I told my three year-old that I was taking her to her first dance class. Her eyes flickered with a type of light you rarely see in us grown-ups. She immediately found her well-worn pink heart shirt with attached tutu and of course her pink bedazzled “dance” shoes. She looked ridiculous and amazing all at the same time and dance class was a mere 4 days away. Yet, wearing her “heart” literally on her sleeve she proceeded to live her best dance all day long.

What she taught me is that we often are “trying” where as she just “allowed.” We are trying so hard to find our creative spark that we miss it all together. Or, it feels so buried or dulled down that we do not know how to blow life back into it. As children we know how to feel free and alive without giving it any thought at all. It is an impulse that springs us forth into action and allows us live our dream whatever it may be in the moment. It is that animating force that encourages us to dance our best dance. That is until we get the message that we look silly or that we can’t possibly accomplish what are heart is calling us to do.

What is that thing that makes one happy? It is different for all of us. For some a process. It may be buried but it is there all the same. Waiting to be recognized again. Little things might make the difference. Humming that tune, creating in the wee hours, making the time for you.

Dig out those dance shoes. The ones that are not well-worn and are buried deep within the closet where you have been keeping them for that special event. Let today be that day. Be compassionate to yourself, and when you are ready to create call it forth with a type of “gusto” only you can bring!