Moving through Fear with Art

Recently, I have felt some roadblocks in my creativity. Not feeling inspired to paint or continuing to cycle through the same image over and over again. I came to realize that it was fear that was preventing me to paint and letting go of preconceived results. This made me think of how art can be used to work through fear.

When I am working on canvas or paper there is a decision that has to be made. What color to put down or what stroke to be made. It can be a spontaneous movement of energy while taking in the elements of what inspires me to make the next move. When there is fear there is stiff movement with too much thought and less guided direction from within. The same can be said when we procrastinate, if our energy is not utilized it is trapped and we loop back to the same fear or limitation preventing us from working at our dreams. The thought of actualizing our dreams can be a fear as well. Because, we have this preconceived idea of what our life should look like once our dreams are realized. So, we then live in constant pursuit of a dream that is alive only in our thoughts. Life obviously does not work this way. There are always twists and turns and the mystery of life often surprises us with what makes us truly happy.

Art can help us move through our fears. It can be an exercise at stepping outside of our comfort zone and trusting that we will know what to do next.  There may be mistakes, but you learn to accept them and move in a different direction.  And if it doesn’t turn out it is still an act of creation that needs to be respected because it served a purpose in the moment. As my teacher once said it’s only paper or canvas after all.

Creating art is an internal process; it can be like a compass in your life that leads you. You may not know where you are at any given moment, but art can provide comfort in a world of uncertainty.

Fear creates lots of excess energy, and if it isn’t utilized it gets trapped and stored in the body. Art can be a way to move through this fear and release it. There is nothing more refreshing and therapeutic then to start anew with a blank canvas.

In order for me to move out of my head, I focus on the movement of my brush strokes while finding shape in contrasting colors. Taking in the colors that I see in a sunset or the way the tall grass moves in a field are the elements that are within me and come through in a painting. So, I continue to take notice in life, to be present helps me to “be” without fear and within a safe space in art. 

 

Painting From the Heart. What I learned from my five year old

 

 “Angel Painting” by Kai Duckett, 5 years old

Being authentic to who you are as a person and as an artist takes time and practice. There are times as an artist where I revert back to old patterns of what I think people will like or what will be accepted. This is when my art lacks that inner glow or illumination. It often looks stiff or as artists call it “over-worked.” Overworked with too much thought and not enough emotion and heart. It is often not from the heart but the head.

At times I will go back to these old patterns of not being true to my inner artist. When I am in these places I feel lost, and beyond frustrated.  Recently, I was finding myself in this place once again. It was my five year old that reminded me of the process of painting from the heart. He just sat down and started painting, not with thought and emphasis on the finished project. He approached the process with an eagerness to accept whatever inspiration was to be reflected back to him. He allowed the process to work its magic and he was the instrument for it happening on paper. He was working from his heart or center and letting the colors flow from within.

Matthew  Fox in the book “Creativity”  says it best “when we create we are pouring gifts of being back into the universe itself. This pouring of being into the universe is a joyful act and ecstatic art (Fox, 141).” I like this imagery of pouring our being or authentic self onto the paper. The art than becomes a reflection of who you truly are.  As our lives change art can be a way of redefining who we are.  Redefining who you are with art can be liberating. Because, once we live our life from a place that is true to who we are not what we think we should be doing, we are living the hand crafted life. A life that resonates with who we truly are. The inside matches the outside.

As children we naturally live our lives this way it is only as we age we forget. It was watching my son and his process that reminded me of living the hand crafted life . When I asked him about it he said “mom don’t listen to your brain but your heart and bones.” He continued to tell me that the “brain has its own ideas. And the heart tells you what colors to use. If you paint it does not matter if it changes. Allow the change. Spill yourself out of your heart and  just paint.”